The Last Unicorn
by Atiannala
Summary: Severus looks among the bloody remains of the final battle and sees one shining thing in the mist of the destruction. Can he save that light before its extinguished forever? HGSS!
1. Ends and Beginnings

Disclaimer: This is not mine; the characters are property of the amazing JK Rowling and co.

Warning: This is a Severus Snape and Hermione Granger fic! I repeat Hermione and Severus will be involved! If you don't like that, don't read this!

And with that let us continue on

Chapter 1: Ends and Beginnings

It was finally quiet; night after night of deafening noise was followed by a prolonged and empty silence. Bodies lay piled up atop the red ground, neither friend nor enemy could be distinguished in death. He had never seen so much destruction at once throughout his entire life—and considering the state of his life, that was saying something. Surveying the surroundings he cursed his bad luck at having once more avoided death.

Gradually people began to move, began to gather into small groups as they searched for survivors among them. He had planned to die here; his entire life had been leading up to this battle and there was nothing more for him now. The death he had sworn he would live to see had finally happen, and the cause he had devoted his life to was over, yet he still remained. He stood a lone figure among the moving shadows feeling misplaced. The others were moving to find family and friends, to take back the lives that they had fought to keep— but he had no other life. This had been his life, and a fitting punishment it must seem to have to live now without purpose. His mission was over and yet he must carry on with all the guilt and regret from the deeds he committed to see the downfall of the man he hated. He was doomed to spend the rest of his life in the chains of his past. He might have considered ending his misery had he not known the price of his own life. As it was to keep his life had cost him the willing sacrifice of the only friend he ever had—a price too great to throw away.

He began to accept his fate as he watched friends gather together limping over the battlefield that was still fresh with blood. It had all been too easy; Minerva had found evidence while cleaning out Dumbledore's rooms to confirm that Dumbledore was as involved with his murder as Severus himself was. Minerva sought him out, told him they knew the truth and would stand by him after the war if he stood by them in the final battle. Not planning on seeing the time after the war he had agreed. And he knew then it had been too easy, just as it had been to convince Dumbledore of his true allegiance in the first place. Forgiveness and understanding seemed to mock him with every breath he took; others forgave him when he couldn't forgive himself. Life was a far worse punishment than death.

He still stood there watching the shadows move against the dark sky. The movements began to slow and dissipate, and he watched the last group clear from the field. No one had stopped to talk with him or help him from the field, though he never expected them to and would have thought them mad if they did. He took a deep breath and slowly exhaled before attempting to move, when his eyes caught a glimmer in the faint moonlight. It appeared that the last group had lingered so long in attempt to remove someone who wished to remain. As he moved closer to the body of what he now determined to be a woman, her pale skin was illuminated by moonlight and he recognized her.

He had seen her countless times before, but never has she looked quite like this. Red stains clung to her white skin and to her hair obstructing the glow of the moonlight. Her face was cast down and her eyes stared straight before her at two bodies on the ground—two bodies he recognized as her best friends.

It may have been an instant or it may have been an eternity that he stood there facing the girl watching her—the only movement was that of the moonlight through her tears. Finally, she turned her face up to meet his, her dark eyes shining with so many emotions that they were fearsome to behold. She uttered one word, the first word she had spoken since finding the two boys this way, and it was a word that was meant for him, one word whispered into the lonely night.

"Why?"

There were a thousand possibilities circling her question, but he knew the only true meaning: why am I still here when they are gone? He studied her face, watching the emotions flicker over her features, sorrow, regret, anger, guilt, countless more, and he felt them all too. Though he couldn't claim to like either boy that lay in front of him, he felt for them remorse—remorse that they had died, innocent as they were, while he stood looking down at them with his blood soaked hands. Returning his gaze back to the girl before him, he fancied that he could see the innocence fading from her features with every passing second, true innocence that was thrust into the world too quickly. And with everything that ran through him that night, one thing one thought struck him now: if she lost the goodness behind her strong features, then she would face life the same way he had for years, alone.

He recognized it now; she was beginning to lose hope. Those she loved had been ripped away prematurely and she was dying inside as they had died before her. Her home had been destroyed, her parents had been murdered a month before and their bodies burned in the rubble of their home along with their possessions, and the second family she had found through Hogwarts had died as well. This could not happen to her! Because for all of her talents, the one which had always stuck out to him was her ability to hold judgment and treat people fairly. She had embodied truth and justice in a time of prejudice and he could not just sit and watch those qualities die.

Before he really knew what he was doing, he bent down and cupped her cheek staring intently into her wet eyes.

"Because in you, there is still hope."

She gasped faintly, whether at his words, his touch, or the intensity behind the moment he did not know, but when he slid his hand down her arm and grasped both her hands, she allowed him to help her up.

"There is nothing more you can do here. There are crews forming now to help those who have fallen, they will be taken care of. But come, you have seen enough for one day."

Though she had not let her group of friends lead her away from this disturbing scene of death, she nodded slightly and allowed him to steer her away from the place. The night had shaken her and weakened her as well, making it hard for her to move through the devastation. When he put a strong arm around her shoulders to guide and stabilize her she silently accepted. He wasn't exactly sure what had transpired that night, or why he had been able to get through to her when no one else could, but he was certain of one thing as they walked slowly off into the night: no matter what happened from this day forth, he was going to protect her and make sure she received the life he never had, no matter what it entailed.

Yes, the first chapter is short but the rest will be longer I promise. This fic should not be too long, but it will be complete. And for the sake of my own sanity, please note that Severus wants to protect the virtues he sees within Hermione right now, but that is it. He has no other feelings for her romantic or otherwise, he was looking for a new meaning and a way to forgive himself, and it is in not letting her lose what he treasures above other things. This chapter was vague, I know, but the rest will be crispy clear. Next chappy will be up in a few days. Reviews appreciated!

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	2. Diagnosis and Solutions

Diagnosis and Solutions 

Molly Weasley was in the living room of the Burrow fussing over her daughter. Though Ginny had sworn she had suffered nothing more than a few scratches, her mother refused to let her out of her sight, and insisted on healing every single cut or bruise on Ginny's person. The news that her youngest son would not be returning home tonight had hit her particularly hard, and to avoid facing the issue head on she was focusing intently on analyzing every injury her daughter had received while tears streamed from her eyes.

Ginny pulled her left arm out of her mother's grasp, when Molly began checking it for scratches the third time. "Mom, I'm fine really!"

"Now Dear," she hiccupped between sobs, "We can't be completely sure. Wouldn't….. want….. something to happen….." and she broke down into tears once more.

Reluctantly and fighting tears of her own, Ginny placed her arm back into her mother's shaking hands. Instead of resuming her fussing, Molly laid her head upon the arm sobbing, "He was only a baby!"

The two embraced letting tears flow freely from their eyes. They would have to stop soon, they would have to be strong for the others when they got back from clearing the field, would have to be strong when they prepared for the funerals, but for now they could cry until their eyes were sore.

Somewhere in the back of Molly's mind it occurred to her that it was somewhat miraculous that out of seven children, she had only lost one. And of course, she was thankful that the rest her children and her husband with nothing more severe than a few broken ribs. The pain of losing her baby boy, however, was just too much. Her youngest son was gone before he even had the chance to really live. He had been of age for a few months. Noting could compare to the grief of losing a child.

For her own part, as daft as Ron could be at times, he was always her closest sibling. She was just a year behind him in school, they played on the Quidditch team together, spent much time together voluntarily, and secretly she enjoyed the looks that he would give to any guy who looked at her suggestively—it made her feel safe to know he was looking out for her. And now he was gone. And so was Harry—but no, she couldn't think about that. Not yet.

Suddenly, a loud knock interrupted their mourning. Molly sat back and whipped her eyes with her apron before straightening up and walking toward the door, wondering what new horrors awaited her on the other side.

To say she was shocked at the sight that lay past her threshold was an understatement. On her front porch stood Severus Snape his arm firmly clasped around the shoulders of one Hermione Granger. Both were looking quite worse for wear, and the young girls eyes were staring straight ahead of her as if she was seeing nothing. Molly had heard about from the boys when they had been home after the fighting that Hermione had refused to leave the sides of Ron and Harry. Since they knew they would return soon to help put the fields at right, they had left her as she had wanted to carry out her lonely vigil. And now here she stood on Molly's front porch leaning on one the one person Molly had personally thought she would never see again. She must have been standing dumbfounded for a moment because a deep voice broke through her shock.

"I know they are taking the injured to Hogwarts if they cannot or do not wish to return home, but it seemed more fitting to bring her here, if that is alright?"

"Yes of course," Molly began nodding and waving them in making room for them to get through the small hallway. "Let me go make up a bed. Ginny!" she called grateful for this newest distraction, "Go get the spare bed clothes from the upstairs closet, we have a guest tonight."

As Molly began preparing a place for Hermione, Severus guided her into the kitchen and turned on the sink. He ran a cloth under the faucet and began to wipe the blood from her face still unsure of what or why he was doing this. The girl whimpered as the cold cloth touched her skin. "It's alright Hermione, you're going to be okay now."

Insider her own mind, Hermione wondered if she would ever really be "okay" again. Nothing was right anymore, the whole world had been flipped on it head and she felt as if she had been thrown from an airplane without a parachute. As she drew in a long breath she became aware of the shaking in her chest. And apparently it was evident in the sound of her breathing for Snape looked deeply into her eyes and told her firmly, "You will," and then softer. "Trust me."

Whether it was a statement, a request, or a question, neither really knew, but as they stood their locking eyes, Hermione gave the only response she could think of, a small nod. The corners of his mouth turned up slightly as he tried to give her a reassuring look. No, it wasn't a smile, but it was probably the closest he had come to one in more than a decade.

When Molly returned to the kitchen, she took in the sight before her thinking that war sure did strange things to people.

"Come dear, lets get you into a nice warm bath." Hermione allowed herself to be pulled away from Severus knowing that a bath sounded quite good, and that it was not right for him to follow, but as she left her eyes lingered on his until she could see them no more. When they got upstairs, and Hermione still had yet to move on her own, it became apparent that Molly would have to help with the bath. She and Ginny helped Hermione out of her clothing and into the small pool of water and Molly began fussing to wash the blood out of her hair while Ginny talked to Hermione trying to reassure her. The older girl never responded, just sat there with her eyes fixed upon her knees.

When Hermione was finally clean, they took her to the bed they had made for her, dressed her, and tended to her wounds. "You will feel better after a good night of sleep," Molly had told her. For some reason Hermione just didn't believe her. Once the other two women had left her alone, Hermione looked down at the small wooden ring that was on her finger and she could still hear his voice as he slid it on her finger.

"It's only temporary, until I can buy you a real one, but I just couldn't ….. I wanted to know before everything happens that we will be together when it's all over. There wasn't time to get a ring, but I will go once everything calms down, I promise."

Hermione had shaken her head saying, "No, it is the most beautiful ring I have ever had! It is much nicer having you make me a ring; you don't have to get me a fancy one."

Ron had smiled as he pulled her toward him kissing her passionately. They had not yet told anyone of their intentions, thinking that the news would be better received once the fighting was done.

Well, now it was over and she was alone again. First her parents had been taken, then her love, and now even the family she had adopted in adolescence was a painful reminder of what she had lost. She had nothing but the wand. Fresh tears sprang to her eyes as she looked at the small ring made with love and took it reluctantly off of her finger. Reaching behind her neck, she fashioned it onto the necklace and watched as the ring slid down the chord and fell under her nightdress. She would wear it here above her heart always. Tears soaked her pillow as she cried herself to sleep.

Severus had barely moved from his spot by the sink as he stood trying to figure out what exactly he was doing. He had seen the pain in her eyes, and it had affected him more than he had thought possible. Hermione was safe now, among friends; maybe he should leave now while he still could. Then why was he still standing there, gripping the edge of the counter as if his life depended on it?

Quickly, be rational, he advised himself. He had nothing, no where to go since his home had been ransacked and destroyed when his betrayal to the Dark Lord had become apparent, though much to late to stop his downfall. There were many who would call him an ally but none who would call him a friend. Some money was left in his account, he could probably buy a new house, but to live he would need a job, another thing he no longer had. Knowing the world would not be nearly as forgiving as the Order, he would be hard pressed to find employment anywhere.

And there was still the question of Hermione. Well, what question was that really? She would wake up tomorrow, and the world would gradually put itself right again. But could he know that for sure? Would she be okay if he left her? After all, he had promised her she would be. Damned that girl with her bewitching eyes!

When Molly entered the kitchen, he was no closer to finding an answer than he was to begin with. Her presence startled him from his thoughts and he jumped slightly, the night's events had unnerved him. "The girl is she alright?"

Molly shook her head and looked at her hands that were clasped in front of her. "I….. I don't know. We healed her wounds and cleaned her up, but she won't speak. She's practically catatonic." Her voice cut off in a whisper and Severus ran a hand over his face annoyed that she did not seem well and that he actually cared. Molly continued. "She will be fine for the night, but I think….. I think maybe a professional should look her over to make sure there is no lasting damage."

Severus nodded, a collection of healers had gathered at Hogwarts, she would need to go there. Voicing this to Molly, she agreed. They would wait and see if she seemed better in the daylight, and if not, take her to Hogwarts.

"Severus," Molly's kind old voice brought Severus out of his thoughts again, "You have done much for Hermione tonight, and she has been like a daughter to me. Thank you."

He nodded still uncertain of everything that was going on.

"Why don't you stay here with us tonight?"

He was shocked. Molly had always offered him dinner and a place to stay in the past, but that was before….. before the incident. He had not hoped for such kindness tonight, and would find it much harder to refuse the offer being that there was really no place else for him to go. Opening his mouth to object, Molly cut in.

"You cannot refuse, I know what happened. There is nowhere else for you to go. I will make up a bed for you tonight. If our hospitality is that offensive to you still in the morning, then you can go whenever you please, but tonight it is late, and we are all out of sorts." She turned to leave and he called out to her.

"It's not that…… it was never that. I….. I don't deserve….. such kindness."

Molly smiled at him knowingly and departed from the room.

It seemed that everyone slept a little late the next morning. When Severus finally descended the stairs, Only Molly and Arthur were sitting together at the table. Joining them, Severus was offered coffee, which he accepted, and the spent the morning talking of the past few nights as if trying to make them more manageable. Throughout the morning, more people came down the stairs, though the Weasley children glanced at Severus more suspiciously than their parents had. He knew he had never been a favorite among the children and that most probably still did not trust him.

It was odd to be around a family. To see the way they worked together even through their grief. Watching them as they attempted to put the past behind them and get back to normal. Tears occasionally graced the red cheeks of the family, but for the most part, they kept their emotions at bay.

When Hermione still had not emerged from the small room by one o'clock, Mrs. Weasley sent Ginny to fetch the other girl. For some reason, the rest of the room fell into an awkward silence, as if the slightest noise would bring the house to collapse. They were walking on eggshells, and every moment that the two girls stayed upstairs was another moment of pained silence. Severus had just begun thinking to himself that the two were probably gossiping and chatting as young girls often do making them late for everything, when he thought he heard shouting. Another second told him that he did indeed hear shouting and he, Molly, and Arthur were bounding up the stairs toward the sound.

A lump found its way into his throat as he stared into the small room Hermione occupied. The girl was lying on her side curled up, eyes staring listlessly ahead as if seeing nothing. The young redhead was kneeling over her friend shaking her while tears poured down her face, "Please Mione! Please get up!"

Molly was the first to move, walking over and putting an arm around her daughter's shoulders leading the smaller girl from the room. Tears were coming to Molly's eyes as well, it was bad enough to lose Ron, but to see Hermione slipping slowly away from them too, it brought back fresh memories of everything. Arthur went to try his hand at getting Hermione to move, but his attempt also proved vain.

Severus was sure that if her friends could not arouse her, than there was no way that he could, but he had to try, he had promised. So he found himself walking to the bead with uneasy steps—the walk felt far to long to be crossing a small room—and when he finally got there, he knelt down by the edge of the bed.

"Hermione," he said softly and to his surprise, she blinked before her eyes fixed on him. Arthur gasped beside him, relieved that the girl was coming to. Swallowing to relieve the dryness that suddenly had filled his throat and mouth, Severus continued speaking, "Hermione, we need you to get up so we can take you to make sure you are okay. We need to take you to a doctor. I need you to get up."

Hermione sat still for a moment before making what looked like a slight nod, and sitting up. Molly returned to the room in time to see Severus helping Hermione to stand and Arthur muttering "Well, I….." under his breath.

Severus looked at his host and spoke, "Thank you very much for you hospitality, but I am afraid, we will have to cut this visit short. Hermione needs medical attention right away, incase there is anything we might have missed that is affecting her so."

Molly was almost speechless as she watched Hermione's bare feet shuffle underneath the hem of her nightdress as Severus helped her across the floor. When the two finally made it outside and aparated away, Molly and her husband were standing on the porch wondering what had come over both Hermione and Snape. Molly sighed hoping that Hermione would be well soon, and for the sake of the wizarding world at large whatever had possessed Severus to act in such a way stayed there.

When Hermione saw where they had aparated to, she sunk causing her to lean further into Severus. She didn't want to be here any more than she wanted to be at the Burrow, there were too many memories. As she looked up into the main entrance of Hogwarts, she could see herself, Harry, Ron, Neville, and all the others walking toward the same door as a nervous but excited first year. How different everything was back then, how simple. If she could only go back to that time….. Her chest heaved suddenly, and she felt Severus's arm tighten around her giving her the strength to move forward. She couldn't say why, but his presence—so strong and determined—was comforting and she felt almost safe. It wasn't like being around Molly and Ginny where she felt like crying every time she looked at them.

Once inside the old castle, Severus immediately noticed the commotion in the Great Hall, it appeared that it had been converted to a larger version of the hospital wing he had seen so many times throughout the years. Madam Pomphrey was only one of many healers that were dashing back and forth between beds. A call from the right of them alerted Severus and Hermione to the presence of Minerva who came dashing over to meet them.

The old witch began speaking, but Severus heard nothing, because the girl in his arms had started trembling, the hospital having overwhelmed her.

Cutting the witch off he said gruffly, "Minerva please, the girl!"

Only then did Minerva seem to take in Hermione's disheveled appearance and frightened eyes.

"Take her into the hall way," she said to Severus, and shouted into the room, "Poppy come quick!"

Hermione turned her head to avoid looking at those around her, she could practically smell death in the room, and it brought fresh memories of the battle to her. She felt like retching, but she couldn't her body didn't respond.

Finally outside, Minerva conjured a bed for Hermione to sit on and wait for the Mediwitch. As Madam Pomphrey checked Hermione over, Severus informed Minerva of every thing that had happened since the battle, how he had found Hermione, and their stay at the Weasleys. Minerva was holding a hand over her mouth muttering "Poor girl," tears flowing from her eyes.

"Severus, come here."

"What Poppy?"

"I want to see Hermione walk on her own, would you please ask her to do that for me?" The Mediwitch looked at him strangely, and Severus felt as if he were being examined himself.

"Ask her yourself!" he said impatiently.

Poppy's reply was soft, "I did, she didn't move."

Minerva walkover saying something that sounded like "Balderdash" and began speaking to the girl, "Hermione, don't make this difficult for Madam Pomphrey, she is trying to help." When the girl did not even acknowledge the older witch, she was taken aback, "Hermione? Hermione!"

Softly, Severus said, "Hermione," and the girl's head turned and she focused on him. He reached a hand out saying, "Madam Pomphrey would like to see you walk."

Taking his hand, Hermione did her best to stand up unassisted, which was not too good altogether, but she managed. She started walking but did not let go of Severus's hand.

Both women watched as Hermione took a few wobbly steps, her white nightgown flowing around her, before collapsing into Severus. Her hands were clasping onto his robes and her head rested on them hiding their trembling from the older women. Feeling sorry for the girl, Severus picked her up easily and sat her on the bed.

Poppy nodded her head, and called Severus and Minerva away to explain Hermione's condition. "Hermione, it would seem, is in a state of shock. Having lost so much that was so close to her, has affected her emotionally. She has no physical maladies to speak of, but her condition is affecting simple tasks she could easily accomplish before, like walking unassisted."

"But why does she only listen to Severus?" Minerva butted in.

"I was getting to that," the Mediwitch said softly looking at her knotted hands, "This is just a guess, but I think subconsciously, Hermione is blocking out people who she had an attachment for before the war. Severus to her, is someone both known and yet foreign. Considering her character as a student, I doubt that she would have felt very negatively about Severus having had him as a Professor, which to her would demand respect regardless of the professor's behavior," Severus harrumphed at that, "but she never formed an attachment for him as he was never more than a professor to her. In any case, she remembers that she trusts him from her past, but she does not remember having any semblance of a bond with him. Though it seems now this is the only attachment she is capable of." It was a shambled theory, but the basics made sense, Hermione had never had any fond memories of Professor Snape but she did trust him, she blocked the other's out because they brought back good memories for her—memories that had been ripped away by the war, and now when it was over Severus triggered no painful memories, but he was still someone she knew to trust. He sighed.

"But what does it all mean?" he asked irritated.

"It means," Madam Pomphrey began, "That we would like to see you as primary care taker for Hermione until she is once more of a sound mind."

"What!" Yes, he had wanted to protect Hermione, but he had never thought he might be solely responsible for her wellbeing. He had never had children, and he knew nothing about young women and what they might need. It was one thing to make sure nothing bad happened to her, but it was another to take care of her. "How am I supposed to take care of the girl, I don't even had a place to live at the moment."

"Well, neither does she!" Poppy cut in, "and without your protection, she will wind up in St. Mungo's without the attention she needs and she might never recover!" as he looked at the glassy tear filled look in his eyes, he began to understand something. Miss Granger had not only affected him, but many people. She was one of a kind, and having been so kind as a child, she had affected many and many loved her as they watched her grow. They too suffered from seeing her this way, a brilliant mind trapped in suffering. Poppy's soft voice brought him out of his thoughts, "If she only responds to you, without you there is no hope of her getting better. At St. Mungo's they will not be able to get her to respond, and she will spend the rest of her life in their ward for incurables. Though, they will make her comfortable, so she will live a long life in this state. This suffering state."

The lump was back in Severus's throat, as he realized that her recovery depended on him. The responsibility was huge. He wasn't used to having to care for others; he had spent most of his life worrying only about himself—he liked his time and space to himself. To take her in, he would be making sacrifices, ones that he had never been prepared to make for another being before. He had never even had a pet. But as he looked into those eyes, he could see her brilliance hiding behind her sorrow, and he knew that there really was no choice. "I'll do it," and he immediately wondered if this was something he was going to regret later.

Both women smiled and Poppy not excitedly began talking about Hermione's treatment. "You should make her as comfortable as possible, and be certain she eats about three times a day, she might not be hungry, but she needs to eat, and sleep well too. And you should talk to here, even though she might not respond. And where will you stay? Well, I think if you could find someplace out of the country….."

"Madam where do you expect me to find a place outside of England?" He was growing tired of her speech, did she even breathe between sentences? Also, hearing his countless responsibilities made him uneasy.

Minerva who had looked thoughtful for a while finally spoke, "My family owns a villa in the south of Italy. It is small, but it has a small library. I know she'll like that. It is in a remote area so there won't be a lot of neighbors. It will also be warm, and nothing like England. Yes, it will do quite nicely."

The three talked for a while about the various plans, Severus and Hermione were to leave that evening. Severus was relieved to hear that there was a house elf at the villa who remained there year round to maintain the place. She had seen many girls Hermione's age as Minerva's family was famous for having girls and the elf would be able to advise Severus if there was something the girl needed. He also agreed to correspond by owl with Poppy to inform her of Hermione's condition and receive advice should he need it. Minerva took Hermione's measurements and said she would send over some new clothes for the girl. After about an hour of preparations, they were finally ready to be on their way.

They ate one last meal at Hogwarts, which took longer than most because Severus had to continually coax Hermione to eat something, before leaving. As they stood outside ready to aparate, Severus wondered to himself—for what would be neither the first nor last time—if he were crazy.

SSSSSSSS

Hope you enjoyed it, I know it was a bit more introduction, but I needed to set things up properly without being vague. Next chappy up in a few days. Sorry if it seems like not much happened in this chapter, but I needed it to set up for the rest of the story. Things start to pick up quickly from here, I have big plans for this one.

Let me also say, that I got the idea to write this fic, while driving home from work at night, listening to an old Kenny Loggin CD. The song _The Last Unicorn_ came on and I had the image that I tried to create in the first chapter. Severus looks among the bloody remains of the final battle and sees one shining thing in the mist of the destruction. (hey, I'ma use that in my summary.) She is suffering as much as he is. I initially intended it to be a one-shot when a billion more ideas hit me. (which is why I needed an additional set-up chapter). The name of the fic will play into it later as well.

I wanted to thank kriitikko, just another great Gatsby, and Mandi6a6i for their reviews and their support! You made me very happy! I am glad you liked it!


	3. Arrivals and Settlings

_Arrivals and Settlings _

They arrived at the small house late. Both Severus and Hermione were exhausted and in need of some sleep. Helping Hermione up the stairs, he found that there were two bedrooms and a washroom down the hall. Vaguely familiar with the layout of the place, Severus lead Hermione into the larger room which was closer to the bathroom incase she needed to find it in the middle of the night. He turned down the sheets helping her into the bed and pulling the light sheets up over her.

It was after he got her settled in that he realized she was still holding onto his hand. He looked up at her and when their eyes met, she game him a small half-smile. The gesture was small and seemed that it took a lot of effort to make, but it was there, thanking him for taking her away. He gave her a short nod before turning and leaving the room.

Dipsy the house elf was standing in the hall waiting for him. "Missus says Mr. Snape and Miss Granger be staying at the house. Dipsy happy to help!"

Severus nodded at the small elf and told her to listen for Hermione that night. If she woke up, he would need to be informed immediately.

"Yes, Mr. Snape!" she piped up glad to help. She was an older elf, and seeing that this house had not been used in a while, she was doubly excited to have a task to perform.

The walk to his own room was a weary one, he had not realized how tired he had been before, but it hit him now like a ton of bricks. He did not even bother changing before bed, he just removed his shirt and shoes. His head was barely on the pillow before he was asleep.

Morning came quickly bringing chirping birds, sweet smells, and warm lights. As Hermione awoke and became aware of her surrounds, she thought that it seemed the whole world was waking up and not just her.

"Oh! Missy is awake!" She heard a high-pitched voice saying. A small house elf had come into the room. She was wearing what looked like a potato sack over her body and had a bright yellow flower tucked behind her large right ear. Though Hermione still thought the idea of keeping a house elf was abysmal, the cheerful look on the elf's face made her feel a bit better. "Dipsy will go get Mister!"

A moment later Dipsy returned with Severus who was rubbing sleep from his eyes and brushing his hair back from his face. He had not slept that well in years, and felt much better for it. "Ah, Miss Granger," he began upon seeing her awake, "glad to see you awake."

Walking to the bed he pulled back her covers helped her out of the bed. When he felt her hands on his back, he remembered that he had slept without a shirt and rushed in here as soon as he heard that she was awake. Silently cursing what a good night sleep had done to make him absent minded, he noted the almost amused look in his patient's eyes.

"Well you didn't expect me to sleep in my teaching robes did you!" he snarled irritated. Hermione looked down and he was afraid at first that he had scared her, until he realized that she was smirking, and her mouth seemed to move a little bit freely than it had last night. Feeling that this was Hermione's way of laughing at him, he was indignant. "Well I never!"

Hermione immediately looked more serious, and looked up at him with a blank face. But he noticed that her eyes seemed a little warmer, the way they had before the war. Confusion filled him as he sighed and helped her downstairs to the kitchen.

He had still yet to put on a shirt, as if defying her surprise at seeing him shirtless. Why shouldn't he not wear a shirt? Just because he didn't do it usually didn't mean it couldn't be done.

Glad for the large breakfast he ate his eggs hurriedly and drank down his juice. By the time he was finished, Hermione still had not touched her breakfast. "Miss Granger, I think you can at least manage to eat some toast!"

When she took one bite and seemed like she could barely swallow it, he began to get irritated. No one said that this would be easy, but if he couldn't even get her to eat breakfast….. Sighing he moved to sit beside her, trying to win her over with soft words. It was hard for him not to lose patience with her, but he had made his vow. "Hermione please, you need to eat so you can get better."

She turned to face him, a pained look in her eyes, as if being conscious for a while had reminded her of her suffering all over again. Not letting his gaze drop from hers, he picked up a slice of toast and held it up to her mouth. The look in her eyes practically begged him not to make her eat, to let her starve, to end her pain at living longer than her family and friends. Her gaze shook him to the core, but he remained solid pressing the toast softly to her lips and whispered, "I didn't come this far to let you die."

A single tear rolled down her cheek as she took a bite from the toast, but she ate both slices, and drank half of her juice. "Good," Severus said standing up feeling slightly awkward after having fed her. "I am going into the living room if you care to join me."

Hermione looked up so Severus assumed that meant she would, so he helped her into the other room and seated her on the sofa while he occupied the matching chair. Minutes passed, and the ticking from the damned clock on the wall filled the room resounding through Severus's brain with every toc. Hermione sat there the whole time looking straight ahead of her with her hands on her lap.

Trying to amuse himself Severus found a book that interest him and began reading. However, he was painfully aware of Miss Granger's presence in the room distracting his focus. Damn it all! He had spent six years wishing nothing more for the insufferable girl to shut up, and now here he was wishing she would speak! The silence was unsettling, unnerving, he didn't know what to do or how to deal with this. He wasn't a people person and he certainly couldn't interact with someone who just sat there. It was so awkward he imagined the silence was deafening him. Finally, if only to drown out that godforsaken ticking, Severus began reading out loud. His voice resonated through the small house and he immediately began to feel better. What's more, he noticed Hermione looking at him interestedly. He stood and began to pace in the room while reading and her eyes followed him. At first he was at a loss, but quickly realized that this was going to make his life much easier.

"Do you like my reading?"

She nodded.

Severus felt a million times better, they wouldn't have to sit in that awkward silence any longer. "Well shall I continue this one, or read something else?"

Again she nodded, before a pink colour tinted her cheeks as she realized she didn't answer at all.

"Continue?"

She nodded again, and Severus sat down beside her, so that she might see the book. Neither seemed to notice that they slid even closer while Severus read aloud.

Dipsy interrupted them half past noon carrying a tray with sandwiches and drinks. They were so close that Hermione's hair was tickling Severus's hair. Embarrassed at first Severus wrote it off thinking that Hermione's hair was quite large and was not a good indicator of how close they had been sitting. Hermione's eyes widened when Severus thanked Dipsy and nodded approvingly. She ate much more eagerly this time, though still not enough in Severus's opinion.

After lunch Hermione began to look distressed and started rocking in the bench. Worried that this might be some new progression of her delicate state, he began babbling things to calm her. Much to his dismay it did nothing to sooth her. Soon, however he realized that she wanted to get up. He helped her to her feet and walked her up the stairs that she had been looking at longingly. At the top of the stairs he realized the problem feeling heat rise into his cheeks. He escorted her to the washroom and waited for her outside as she could use the sink and walls for support in the tiny room.

She emerged, eyes cast down, just as embarrassed as he had been. Realizing the silliness of the situation, being that everyone had to use the facilities, he took her arm saying, "There, much better, now what shall we read next?"

Thankful not to prolong the odd situation, Hermione focused on hobbling down the stairs. The stairs for Severus were the worst. They grinded upon his patience as they took so long for her to fumble down. At the moment, they had gotten down two steps. Severus sighed looking at the rest of the stairs that loomed in front of them. Something had to be done.

"Forgive me, Miss Granger," he said scooping her up in his arms and whisking her down the stairs. She clutched on as she went what she was sure was too quickly down the stairs and into the living room. Severus placed her gently on the couch before taking out a book and reading aloud again. Though Hermione remained stiff at first, she gradually allowed herself to become involved in the reading, shifting her weight to lean slightly toward Severus. She listened to his voice going on and on about a potions experiment gone wrong, that caused the brewer to act like a bird for three months—apparently he was trying to create a potion that would allow the drinker to fly without using a broom. When he read, and she focused on his words, it gave little time to other thoughts occupying her thoughts. Should she have read on her own, she could easily have gotten lost in thought whereas having to listen meant no time for stray thinking.

In that moment, Hermione thought that perhaps there was still hope after all—sitting in this nice warm room, surrounded by nothing except peace, listening to Severus's voice, this was a different world than the one she had been in yesterday. This one was….. nice. Without intending to, she let her head fall onto Severus's shoulder. He stiffened and his words stopped as realization hit Hermione. Righting herself quickly she came out of her daze remembering why she was here, and what had happened. Tears welled up inside of her spilling into the open air and emotions tore through her. They were dead, all of them, every one who cared for her—well almost everyone. And she could do nothing. Nothing!

She fell to her knees sobbing uncontrollably gasping for air as if she were suffocating. Severus himself was nearly in a panic as he realized that the slightest gesture could set her off at any moment. Yes, he thought, this was going to be as hard if not harder than he first anticipated.

He talked to her to calm her down, but she continued her rampage unhindered. Tentatively, he reached a hand out to her shoulder, which caused that horrid gasping to stop. Unsure could not even begin to describe how he felt but he rubbed a hand across her back, but she did not stop crying or shaking.

Severus was nearing his wits end: he was the sort of guy who went out of his way to avoid emotional outburst, and here he was trying to comfort a shattered girl. Whatever had led him to think he could do this? Frustration welled within him, and he restrained himself from throwing something across the room, especially because the nearest thing was Miss Granger. There was a tug on his sleeve, and he found himself looking into Dipsy's large eyes. He scowled down at her.

"Perhaps," she began with a squeak, "If you were to hold her. That's what the Mistress do when her daughters is crying."

Severus looked from the elf to the girl on the floor. Exasperated as he was, he positioned himself awkwardly around Hermione's shaking form and pulled her onto his lap, situating her so that she was facing him, her knees on one side of his body while her head rested on his shoulder. He looked at Dipsy for help, and she made a motion to say "go on."

He began making small circles with one of his hands on her back and rocking her back and forth. Dipsy continued to gesture at his, though he was truly frayed and barely could continue. Ignoring the elf, he bent his head close to Hermione's ear and began to whisper things in her ear like "hush," "calm down," and "everything going to be okay." Somehow, cradling her became less awkward and almost natural as basic human instincts began to work through Severus. Closing his eyes, he buried his face in her hair, continuing to rub her back and repeat calming words the whole while. Soon, his forehead was resting on the side of hers while his nose gently brushed her cheek.

Hermione was finally calming down, the torrent of her emotions replaces by the warmth of human contact. Her breathing began to match that of the breath she could feel on her cheek, and as she clung to the flesh in front of her, she stopped shaking. Finally after her tears had stopped and she had regained control over herself, she began to nod off. She took in a deep breath, and exhaled it, "Seve….."

Severus looked up suddenly as he had been almost certain that she had begun to say his name when she let out her breath. Looking at the sleeping girl in his arms, he decided that it must have been his mind playing tricks on him. He settled Hermione onto the couch and told Dipsy that he would be preparing dinner tonight.

A gentle smell permeated through the house and woke Hermione from her slumber. She began to work to pull herself upright when Severus came into find her. "Allow me," he said picking her up once more and carrying her into the kitchen. She was light enough, and it was so much faster just to carry her.

Dinner smelled really good, and Severus had taken the time to cut Hermione's chicken into small pieces to make it more manageable. Severus enjoyed cooking, it was similar enough to potion brewing to put him in his element so to speak, and the fact that he didn't have to worry about it blowing up at any given moment was comforting. Yes, cooking relaxed him. And it had done him so much wonder that he had even had the ability to foresee the problems Hermione might have coordinating a fork and a knife. His mood had improved greatly since allowing himself sometime in the kitchen, and he thought about telling Dipsy to allow him the pleasure of fixing dinner every night.

Noticing that Hermione had taken her first bites, he asked her how it was and was rewarded with a smile that was less pained than the one she gave him last night. Severus nodded and they ate in peace.

Eating made Hermione tired so Severus carried her up to bed—going up the stairs was far more tedious than coming down them—and tucked her in. Having nothing else to do, Severus himself decided to lay down.

The morning saw a delivery by owl post of some nice new clothing for Hermione. Severus had gotten up early ad showered, and drew a bath for Hermione. As he went to fetch her, he noticed that Dipsy was opening the package and showing Hermione her new clothing. He thought she looked pleased.

He helped her to the lavatory and told Dipsy to accompany her incase she needed any help washing her hair or getting dressed. When Hermione finally emerged from the bathroom, she was wearing a long light blue sundress, and her hair had been braided and tied back with a matching ribbon.

Severus smiled before he had actually realized it was happening, which caused Hermione to blush. "Perhaps, since you have some decent clothes today you would enjoy spending sometime outside?"

Hermione nodded. They spent the morning much the same as the previous one, and went outside after lunch. There was a large tree in the back yard that someone had fashioned a swing onto long ago. The grass was long coming up to the bottom of his calf, but Hermione kicked out of her shoes apparently enjoying the feeling of the earth between her toes. A small pond lay a short distance away, and Hermione it seemed loved to watch the birds on the pond. Severus went in early to fix dinner, but Hermione insisted on staying outside for sunset.

When Severus went out to collect Hermione, she was drawing in the sand with a small stick, the golden rays of the sun shone through the now loose braid in her hair. Something twitched inside Severus, and he found himself stopping and clearing his throat before finally reaching Hermione. When he reached her, she held up her arms too tired to walk, and he carried her inside, knowing that he was indeed crazy.

Life at the villa fell into an easy routine. They would wake and eat, read until lunch, and spend some time outside before dinner. It was an easy life and it appeared to do Hermione good. Through their first week, Severus only had to undergo three more outbursts, but they were becoming far more spread out and He became accustom to them, and new better how to comfort her. Her eyes began to look less burdened and she seemed to begin to express her feelings more freely so that Severus did not have to guess at them any more. He hated to think that he himself was becoming less guarded, but he had caught himself, once or twice, expressing his thoughts with his face as well.

It was hard not to, considering his companion never spoke at all. She seemed to take on a surreal quality at times—like when she was outside. Somehow it seemed that she understood something else about nature now that he didn't understand still being bound by words. In any case, he had to learn to read her without using words, so he found he expressed himself without words sometimes.

By the time he had written his first letter to Poppy, Hermione had improved much in spirits, and the Mediwitch was glad to hear it.

As Severus added some spices to the soup he was cooking one afternoon, he allowed his thoughts to muse over his current state of affairs—a topic he found much more understanding without analysis. Of course it made no sense that he was here, in this remote corner of Italy, with a girl, who had slowly driven him mad over the years he had been forced in her company, helping her to recover from a shock that should have been none of his concern. When he put it that way, the situation made no sense at all, but of course, he knew it made perfect sense in actuality. Why would he be here if it didn't make sense?

Severus had found himself slipping into a comfortable pattern, a state he was grudgingly certain he'd have never reached without his ward. Imagining that he had not found Hermione, and she had not—what needed?—him, he would have probably gone insane taxing himself for something to do. Though, he had a clear name, he still had a shattered reputation. And he couldn't go back to Hogwarts that was certain. No, he would have probably spent the rest of his days varying between creating new potions, spells, and theories while remaining a recluse until his inventions completely ebbed his sanity and he created his most brilliant invention which would likely kill him. Years after he was gone, someone would stumble through his modest abode, find his work, and publish them as his own. Of course, they would botch them horribly, tormenting Severus even in his death with their stupidity. Hermione was of course was much better than the alternative, a wicked smirk spread over his face, especially when she couldn't talk.

Though as pleasant as helping the poor girl recover was shaping up to be, Severus knew that one day she'd get better, and that he should think carefully about the patterns he was getting used to. If he got too used to this mostly carefree life, he ran the risk of becoming attached to it. He had learned the hard way about thinking through before allowing himself to become attached. Still, it couldn't hurt to allow himself a few moments of calm respite considering that after helping Hermione heal, he would likely fall back into the danger of becoming an insane hermit.

The post had arrived by owl interrupting his thoughts, but the dinner was almost done and it was nearly time to collect Hermione from outside anyways. Finishing the meal he approached the owl and sorted through the various messages they had received. There was a letter from Poppy with a small attachment from McGonagall, as well as a letter from Ginny who had faithfully written Hermione since their arrival without hope of receiving correspondence in return. Though the sight of the last parchment made his blood run cold.

It was neither addressed nor signed, but bore three words in large red script:

"_I've found you_."

SSSSSSSSSSSSSS

I already have the next chapter finished, it is just in need of some editing, thought I have to work a lot through the weekend, it should be up in a couple days.

A big THANK YOU! to everyone who has reviewed so far. you guys keep the story going for me, and keep me inspired.

But enough of me now, hope you enjoyed it!


	4. Cautions and Meetings

Cautions and Meetings 

His breathing became rapid as he stared at the offending piece of parchment imagining burning holes in it with his mind. It disappeared with a flash of flames as Severus let his emotions get the best of him. With the paper out of sight he began to slow his breath and gather his thoughts.

Who would send this? Certainly he had made many enemies during his past, but this was certainly not their style. His enemies were the hit-and-run type, or the kind that pretended to be friends until the opportune moment. Still it must have been someone from his past….. right?

Panic filled him, and his eyes went large, as he realized that not having been addressed, the letter could have just as easily been for Hermione. His feet flew on wings he never knew they had as he ran out the back door and down to the pond. Palpitations accosted his chest as he could not see the girl anywhere. What if he was too late?

When he neared the pond, he found her and a wave of relief passed over him. It would not have been good if the girl was attacked and murdered on his watch, Minerva would kill him.

Hermione was laying on her belly in the tall grass, making her not so visible to the panicking potions master. Watching the girl he chided himself for getting so out of control. In a real emergency, he would not have been much good if he reacted as he had. Though, he must have been a great deal stealthier than assumed, for he had not disrupted the girl's study of a nearby squirrel. He allowed a moment to watch her wondering what was going through her mind as she stared so intently at the small creature.

It became clear to him now, how selfish this decision had been. Had he been Minerva or Poppy, he would have taken the girl here out of an undying love for Hermione. He himself, realized that he liked being needed. Being the only one to get through to her made him feel important after his former positions had been removed. Without him, she was helpless, and he knew it secretly relishing in the thought.

Feeling the eyes on the back of her head, Hermione turned to look up at Snape and smiled. The look in her eyes made him feel almost guilty, they were so trusting and honest. Living here was like living in a dream compared to the pain she had felt in England, and having been the one to bring her here he must have seemed like some sort of hero to her, her rescuer. Some hero he was, he would probably have left her on the battlefield had she not piqued his curiosity and suited his interests.

He was selfish where she was selfless, maybe that was why this tormented her in was it never had him. He had made sacrifices, but she had sacrificed herself—she had thrown herself head on into the cause, while he attempted to manipulate himself out of it.

Severus Snape was no hero, just someone who looked out for his own interests. He had saved some, murdered others, and now that it was all done, he was looking for peace in the one person who needed to find peace herself. Perhaps helping her made him feel like not such a bad person, perhaps he just liked the way she looked at him as she was now. Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, he allowed himself a return gesture to Hermione before helping her up, wondering if he was the right person to be here helping Hermione.

He had overreacted to the letter he received, overreacted in a way that could have gotten he or Hermione killed. It seemed that a couple weeks of absolute calm had left him inept. Whoever wrote that letter was not attempting to reach out and strike him, they were inviting him to play a familiar game of cat and mouse, and Severus had stupidly run for the cheese. If the culprit had merely wanted to harm either of them, it would have been done by now; instead, he was baiting them, wishing to throw them off guard so that they would be frightened and unprepared when he attacked. Why else would he announce his presence? Or hers if the case was so. The trick was simple, and Severus would not fall victim to it in the last hour. The first thing to do, was to heighten the wards around the house, and try to figure out who their enemy was and what they would likely do next.

Severus was quiet and thoughtful throughout dinner, and more than once, Hermione nudged him with her foot to make him return from his thoughts. No, he would not tell Hermione about the incident. She was in no state to handle such news.

After dinner, Severus read Ginny's letter to Hermione. It was the part of their day when the delusion of being detached from war disappeared. The letters often lead to Hermione's episodes, but Severus had consulted Madam Pomphrey on the issue. They did not think it prudent to allow Hermione to entirely forget her past, being that she needed to learn how to cope with it. At the completion of the letter, tears were sliding gracefully down Hermione's cheeks though nothing remotely sad had been written in the letter at all.

Snape looked at Hermione allowing her a moment before asking if it were time for bed. She nodded in consent as she brought a shaky hand up to brush away the tears. Caught in the moment, Severus cupped her face in his hands brushing away her tears with his thumbs. They shared a gaze for a moment before Severus picked her up and carried her off to bed.

Days pressed on without further incident from the mysterious letter sender, and Severus allowed himself to relax slightly. He even allowed himself a jubilant expression when he returned from the loo one morning to find the Hermione had gotten off the couch, walked to the bookshelf, and picked out book on her own. She seemed very pleased with herself and Severus found it only proper to encourage such behavior. The task had worn the girl out, but it was the first step in improving her motor skills.

Once the news had been delivered to Madam Pomphrey, Severus received from her a list of exorcises that they out to be doing regularly. So, feeling a bit odd, he had begun to practice walking with Hermione outside every afternoon. It provided a perfect excuse not to leave her alone outside anymore, though it meant that Dipsy had to prepare dinner. When he explained it to Hermione it seemed as if she tried to express that Dipsy was a better cook anyways, which made him scowl—almost as much as the fact that he was beginning to understand her easily without using words.

Even though he enjoyed cooking, as of late, he was finding himself in less need of relaxation and distraction than he previously had been. Their work had been progressing well, and Hermione's outbursts had quelled to once maybe twice a week in the short time they had been there.

It was quite a shock on night when he was pulled from his sleep from a loud crash in the hallway. A storm outside made audition a bit of a chore, and not certain what it was that had woke him, he listened closely for a hint. A second after the crash, he became aware of crying and faint screams, and ran out into the hall to see what was the matter.

Something wrenched inside him as he saw Hermione writhing on the floor illuminated for a few seconds by the flashing lightening. The storm must have wakened her, and when she tried to get to him, had taken a bad fall. Rushing toward her he crouched down helping her to her knees. Their eyes met, and in an instant he was pulled into Hermione's mind.

It was dark and loud. Noise came from every angle in all directions, making her want to scream just to drown out the sound. Streaks of color flew through the air blurring her vision. Some hit her, others, stemmed from her wand seemingly of their own accord. She could see nothing but the colors flying around her in every way, couldn't hear where her attackers were. There was laughter in the background, sick laughter mocking her as she turned around to face her enemy who could never be seen. Frustrated, scared, and alone, she shot cursed into empty air hoping to hit something, but they never seemed to connect. The laughter moved around, circling her, confusing her. She couldn't think, couldn't breathe. A spell hit her in the back, she fell shaking to her knees. The laughter went on, louder, stronger. She felt weaker. It hurt. Pain. Someone screamed. Green light shot from her wand and the laughter stopped. She fell forward further, retching, the battle raged on behind her, spells cracking through the air.

Severus pulled back, seeing the fear and pain in her eyes. The storm, with it flashing lights and loud cracks had brought her back there, the final battle. White light filled the room, and another thunder busts shook the walls—Hermione practically dove into his lap hiding.

He scooped her up carrying her to the small room he had been staying in and put her on the bed. She threw herself at the pillows as another crack filled the room. Severus put a muffling spell around the room to drown out the sound of the thunder, while the lightening hardly made it past the thick curtains he had transfigured liking to sleep in the complete darkness.

She was still shaking on the bed, and he sat down beside her rubbing her back to calm her a bit. He pulled her up straighter and placed a hand under her chin to bring her eyes up to meet his. Once more, he entered her mind, though this time voluntarily. Immediately he was pulled into the seen of the final battle once more.

Hermione had fallen forward on her hands, but the noise around her began to soften as a light came up over field, and the grass grew around her hands and knees. The large fielded seemed to shrink, a small house appearing in the background, and a squirrel darted in front of her, as she settled down to watch the busy movements of the squirrel as he gathered nuts.

He had pulled the image to the front of Hermione's mind, and felt her relax as she remembered the squirrel and not the Death Eaters. When he left her mind it she seemed to be caught in a pleasant daydream for a moment before coming to. Looking at him for understanding, he said, "Forgive me for intruding but you pulled me in the first time. You were in such a state, that I wanted to calm you immediately, any other way might have left you thrashing for hours."

She nodded slightly before fixing her gaze on the bedspread in front of her. When tears fell from her eyes, he guessed at her thoughts, and tilted her face up to look at him once more, her eyes were full of shame. "You did what you had to do. If you didn't, you probably wouldn't be here now."

The girl gave a small nod, pressing her cheek into his large palm, but more tears fell from her eyes. Her shoulders shook a couple of times before she buried her head into Severus's chest. A few moments, and a few hiccoughs later, Hermione looked up at him again.

She was struggling with it, what she had done. It was hard to accept, had been in the heat of the moment, but it had to be done. He could see the battle waging behind her eyes and he told her she had done nothing wrong. Nodding again, no tears fell this time.

Her uneasiness was still apparent, and he asked her before he really thought about it, "Would you like to stay here tonight?"

A visible wave of relief passed over Hermione's features as she nodded once more, and gave him a hint of a smile. She reached for the covers and situated herself beneath them before snuggling up to his chest.

An arched eyebrow questioned her presumptions, but was met with her large pleading eyes, and he couldn't deny her. Getting comfortable took a matter of minutes, as he had never shared his bed with another body, and certainly never cuddled like this. Finally they settled down with Severus laying on his back, and Hermione facing him on her side settled into the crook of his arm, her own arm laying across his chest.

His steady breathing helped settle her into sleep, and she drifted off easily, thoughts of the warm yard in her head. It took Severus a good deal longer to fall asleep, having to get used to the weight on his shoulder. He watched her small hand rising and falling with his chest as he drifted off to sleep alternating thoughts of "What have I gotten myself into?" and "This isn't so bad," floating through his head.

It was Hermione who woke up first in the morning, surprised to find that she had rolled onto her other side, and Severus had rolled the same way and was holding her around the waist while her back was held firmly against him. The room was warm and the sheets were comfortable and she felt…..safe. Her eyes began to droop as she snuggled further into the pillows.

The shift in her positioning roused Severus himself into waking. As he tottered in the strange moment between sleep and consciousness, he wondered about the warm soft thing in his arms. Fully conscious now, he suddenly felt very uncomfortable. He lifted his head just a bit to peer at the girl in his arms who was asleep with a lazy half smile on her face. When he tried to pull his arm back, Hermione's sleeping form protested snuggling closer into his body, her hair further covering his face. He fought her hair the best he could with both arms trapped around the sleeping girl. Once he no longer had to worry about suffocation, he attempted to wake her.

He received a few moans of protest before she turned to face him, his arms still pinned beneath her. For a moment their eyes locked and the intensity of the gaze made his stomach flop, which he was sure Hermione could probably feel being that his stomach was practically lying on top of her own.

She shimmied out from underneath him, and made her way to the bathroom, leaving Severus to ponder the fact that she looked much more rested than she had in the rest of their time at the villa. Of course, he had no way of knowing that this was the first night that nightmares had not constantly interrupted her sleep. During their exorcise session that day, she proved much stronger than she had been every other day, the rest having done her much good.

It began the first of many nights, where Severus would go to sleep alone in his bed, and wake up with a Hermione somehow entangled with him. He would always protest in the morning, but sure enough she would be back the following night clinging to him for solace during the night. She usually waited a bit, so that he'd already be asleep, and would sneak down the hallway and crawl into bed allowing the warmth to keep her safe, throughout the night. Severus wondered, as his morning protest became more routine and less heart felt, what exactly was happening but the warmth in his bed provided him with additional rest as well. Grudgingly, or not, he had come to accept the small forlorn girl with her strange sleeping habits.

It had been a week since Hermione had begun sneaking around in the nighttime, and already she was walking almost entirely on her own. She walked easily in the morning, her strength failing her in the late afternoon forcing Severus to carry her around, but it always seemed she had enough strength at night to sneak down the hallway and into his room. Severus watched as she became much more animated as well, though she had still not begun to speak. Poppy suspected that this would be the last thing that she would probably do, and Severus had no reason to suspect otherwise.

They were sitting in their usual position on the sofa, Severus reading the regular letter from Ginny, "….. and there is something that I really would like to confide in you, but I don't want to risk writing in the letter. Do you think you could convince Professor Snape to allow you to come visit the Burrow sometime soon? That is if you are up to it. Oh I do miss you, especially now when I am in most need of a friend. Love always, Ginny."

Hermione sat with a strange expression on her face, contemplating the last bit of the letter. Ginny needed her, and while she had no desire to return to England, she would feel guilty leaving her friend alone when she needed someone. Then again, she had no idea what seeing Ginny would do to her. Well, she had gotten much stronger hadn't she? She could handle seeing one Weasley, especially since she had become used to hearing from Ginny.

Allowing Hermione a moment to consider, Severus looked at her asking, "Well how about it old girl, are you ready for a trip to England?"

With a deep breath, Hermione shook her head. But in a moment she perked up, pointing to the letter spinning her hands and pointing to herself.

"You would like Ginny to come to you?" She nodded enthusiastically. With a heavy sigh, Severus grudgingly agreed and took up a quill and scrawled across it hurriedly.

_Miss_ _Weasley_,

As Miss Granger is not yet up to writing her own correspondence, I am writing to inform you of her wishes. Miss Granger, regretfully, does not feel up to attending you in England but would like to extend her invitation for you to visit us here this Saturday. If this is agreeable with you let us know.

Professor Snape 

Her reply arrived at the usual time the following day.

_Professor,_

_Tell Mione of course I'll come! I'll try to get there early so that we can have the whole day together. (I assume you'd like to be rid of me as soon as possible, right?) Well, Saturday morning it is then. Give my love to Mione!_

_Ginny_

"Well, 'Mione,'" he began, "It seems as if you friend has accepted you invitation and will be here on Saturday morning."

Hermione looked pleased as Severus shuffled through the rest of the mail, wondering how Poppy would feel about the visit of the youngest Weasley when a single piece of parchment confronted in a familiar red writing.

You'll pay for what you've done! 

His eyes narrowed at the piece of paper before him, perhaps the arrival of Hermione's obnoxious friend would prove useful after all. He grabbed his quill and some parchment quickly scribbling to note, one to Ginny and the other to Minerva.

SSSSSSSSSSS

Just so you know, my opinion of Severus is much higher than his own, as yes I adore him. But please do not flame me asking how I could say Severus was not a hero, or something of the likes. Could you honestly see Severus calling himself a hero, because I can't. In any case, he wouldn't in this story, he is portraying the idea of a "hero" in a very stock term as a selfless person who fights for the good of men, Severus fights to stay alive, and to pay for his pasts sins.

Wow! So I thought I had posted this chapter already, apparently I didn't. I have been writing the next chapter which is much longer than this one. I contemplated putting the two together, but then I wanted to post and the next chapter seems to keep growing. But no work tomorrow! Which means I can stay up late/write all I want tomorrow. I thought I'd get this out faster, but alas, I live with a nine year old who consumes most of my time (a little brother who misses me while I am away during the school year).

Thank you to everyone who reviewed! It means a lot to me. Sorry that this chapter is so short, but I will make up for it next chapter which is nearly twice the length and twice the plot movement! Kay, Love you guys!


	5. Memories and Consequences

_Memories and Consequences_

When Saturday morning rolled around and Ginny arrived at the their small cottage, Hermione was upstairs allowing Dipsy to braid her hair. An intense expression graced Severus's features as he awaited the young redhead on the front porch.

"Miss Weasley," he drawled.

"G-good morning Professor!" she said and trying to be as forward as possible added, "I wanted to ask you why it is you asked me to stay the night?"

"The time for that explanation will come this evening, and do wipe that look off you face you will be perfectly safe I assure you. In the meantime, I ask that you do not tell Miss Granger that you are staying here for any other reason than to enjoy her company."

Clearing her throat the girl piped up, "Whys that, sir?"

Snape rolled his eyes and moved closer to the infuriating girl, "Because, stupid girl, she is still very fragile in both body and mind, and such information as you will receive later could hinder the very reason she is here! And being that we don't even know how far she will be set back by _your_ presumptuous visit, we should not cause her undo rest should we?"

Ginny visibly shrank under the heat of her former professor's glare. "No, sir," she whispered.

"Very well, we will go in and I will bring Miss Granger down to meet you."

He turned to enter the house but was stopped by the young girl's voice, "How….. how is she, sir?"

His nostrils flared as he spun round, "You will find that she is up and about walking now, but still refrains from speech, rather you would if you would come inside and stop pestering me with unneeded questions!"

Turning over his left shoulder he flung wide the door and stalked inside. With a sigh, Ginny followed him in and took a proffered seat upon the couch. It was a strange site, she decided when she saw Snape guiding Hermione down the stairs allowing the girl to lean forward upon his arm for support. The same man that had stood before her just moments before seemed to be replaced by someone of a softer nature. The effect was short lived however ending when Hermione's feet were firmly upon the floor and she made her way over to sit on the sofa with her friend.

"I will leave you hens to your clucking!" he declared as he walked briskly out of the sitting room and into the kitchen. They would be eating well tonight.

There was an awkward pause between the two girls on the sofa before Ginny took initiative and pulled Hermione into a tight hug. "Oh I've missed you Mione!"

Hermione's own arms went around the other girl, but they were more tentative, and did not hold the other quite so tightly. As they pulled apart, the younger girl sighed, deciding to waste no time.

"you seem to be feeling better," Hermione nodded slightly and focused on the hem of her skirt. She had been feeling better, but perhaps not as much as she had assumed at first.

Ginny placed her small hand on Hermione's bare shoulder and paused for a moment, before she continued. "The reason I came her, Mione, ….. well, it's because I need your advice…. Well support. You see something happened," tears were welling up in her eyes, and becoming apparent in her voice, and Hermione forced herself to look her friend square in the eyes, despite the pain. As the tears began to fall she continued in a shaky voice, "I've been so alone there without….. oh, Hermione……" Her head dropped into her hand and she curled over allowing herself to cry into her knees for a moment before she righted herself taking a couple deep breaths so she could continue in a steady voice thought it barely reached above a whisper, "I'm pregnant."

Hermione's eyes widened in surprise, but she placed a supporting hand on her friends back. A few sobs escaped the younger girl before she leaned into the arm that Hermione had extended crying into her shoulder. When she was composed once more she spoke, but remained curled in her best friend's arm.

"Before it got really bad, I….. I approached Harry. I knew he was trying to protect me, but I couldn't take it. I had to tell him how I felt, I couldn't let him face…… couldn't let him fight without knowing that I loved him. When I told him," tears were now streaming steadily down her face, "he told me that he loved me too, and he couldn't risk my safety. So I told him I understood. That I wasn't asking for anything more than he could give me right then, but that when he was ready for me, I'd…… I'd be here waiting. It was too much though, and the worse things got, the harder it was, so we began to….. steal little moments, here and there….. When he came home from the mission. We had out moments, and they were the best moments of my life." A small smile tugged at her lips between the tears. "We were reckless though. Our stolen time was hurried, we weren't too careful, and now……" her hand went instinctively down to her stomach,

Hermione pulled her friend into a tighter hug and Ginny snuggled up into her shoulder.

"I know that I'm young, but I can't…… Well it's a little piece of me and a little piece of Harry, the last….." her voice became very small and barely audible, "the last piece of Harry living." After a few more sobs she continued looking up at her friend, "I can't get rid of it Hermione, I just can't." She sobbed harder now, and Hermione buried her face in Ginny's hair as tears fell from her own eyes.

They sat there crying for so long, that Severus even peeked out from the kitchen noticing the absence of sound. When the girls finally stopped crying, they pulled away from each other and wiped their eyes with their hands. Somehow the tears had done them good and Ginny began to chuckle incredulously, and murmured, "I'm having a baby," and then louder wit a semblance of a smile, "a baby."

Hermione reached up a hand and cupped her friend's cheek, and gave her a smile. Ginny began to laugh and seem happy as Hermione continued to smile for her. As their sadness grew into mirth, they found themselves sitting facing one looking down at the sofa with their foreheads pressed together, both lost in thought—Ginny thinking about becoming a new mother and Hermione, how much she truly had missed Ginny while out of the country.

After a few moments, Ginny spoke again, "You know I haven't told Mum yet, you know how she is about propriety. She'll be fuming when she finds out that Harry and I were involved without being married. I don't care thought, not really. A baby!" Ginny let out a laugh, "'Sides, Mum can't be mad for long, it's her first grandchild! Thought I doubt she expected it to come from her youngest child." She paused a bit more before taking up another train of thought.

"You know I guess it was just to big to wrap my mind around at first, but telling you made it easier. Oh Mione! I'm so happy! And I know it's sad still, that Harry is gone, because if he were here well, he'd give his life to this child, I know he would. But I am happy, because after losing Harry, I was….. it was all so terrible, but now. Well, now there is this little person growing inside me, just when I thought that I'd never love anyone again."

Ginny was now being attacked by smiles and found the need to burry her face in Hermione's lap. She talked on for the rest of the time they had informing Hermione of the little things that had happened since her departure, but it was too much for Hermione she listened, but allowed it all to pass into a storage area of her brain, to be processed at a later time.

Hermione signed to Severus after they finished eating dinner to take her up to bed and apologize to Ginny for being so tired. It was when Severus returned that Ginny impatiently asked if she could now know why she was spending the night. His reply was a gruff no, and he settled down into some reading. Half an hour later, Severus opened the door to reveal Professor McGonagall who wore a somber expression.

"Now can I know why I am here so late?" Ginny asked in exasperation.

"This, Miss Weasley, is why you are still here," Severus said throwing the threatening note he received a few days before into her lap.

She read it quickly, asking what it meant.

"It means," cut in Professor McGonagall, "That we are going to make the house undetectable, that is if you agree to being a secret-keeper. We should take no chances as this is the second letter they have received of this nature."

Ginny swallowed a lump in her throat as she nodded, "of course."

"Let's waste no time then," Snape said hurriedly before shutting all the curtains in the cottage.

It was hours later that Ginny was allowed to crawl into bed, she was sharing Hermione's, but before she could sleep, she leaned over and whispered the location into her friend's ear. Hermione would never know about the spell they had just preformed, at least not yet.

Ginny left the following afternoon, having slept late and blaming it on the pregnancy, startling the Potions master who she figured had been listening anyways. The girls hugged before Ginny left, and Hermione remained unusually quiet—or still in her case—for the rest of the evening.

Severus slept particularly well that night knowing that they were safer at the moment than they had been in a while. He awoke the next morning feeling as if something were wrong, it took him a while to place it, but he finally pinned it down—his bed was empty but for him.

He found Hermione in her own bed, looking as if she had not slept particularly well. Though she acknowledged Severus, she did not move. Sighing he went to help her up only to be met with a quick shake of her head.

"Well aren't you getting up today."

No.

"Well, should I bring a book up and read to you."

No.

Getting frustrated, he asked, "Will you at least eat something?"

She was going to say no, but the look in Severus's eyes told her to nod. He was not pleased and she could tell as he called for Dipsy to send up breakfast.

She remained there the entire day, barely moving, lost somewhere in the depths of her mind. Guilt and shame were consuming her as thoughts of Ginny's news plagued her mind. Cursing herself silently, she wondered why she couldn't be like Ginny, having dealt and moved on. Hermione had tried to push it aside, as if it never existed. But the reality had come to her today, life had gone on past the war and if she ever wanted to get better, she would have to accept that.

Ever since moving into this cottage, she had lived as if in a dream. Yes the past still haunted her, but the more time went on, the more she could distance herself from it, imagine she had a different life, and fancy that those tales of Death Eaters and killing curses were all something she had read in a story once. But she had always known they were real, and the guilt of having tried to forget them was crushing her. She had to learn to live with it, and so far, she had failed.

Tears fell from her eyes silently as she lay in bed, but her outbursts had yet to trouble her. They fell harder as she thought of Ron—how could she have tried to forget him like that? She couldn't do that to him, it wasn't right! A bit more than a month ago they were intending to get married, and now here she was living in a remote corner of Italy and allowing herself to get comfortable with another man.

Another stab of pain wrenched through her as her thought wandered to their hasty engagement. She had never intended to wed so early, but in the midst of the fighting—of knowing that the next breath you took could be your last—well they had wanted the comfort of knowing they would be there for each other always. Hadn't the same thing happened to Harry and Ginny? But, now Ginny would take care of their love-child forever. Hermione wondered at her own rash actions and wondered if they could have taken her somewhere she was not ready for.

But when she caught herself she was ashamed of these thoughts. She had agreed to marry Ron—war or not—and had thought it a good idea at the time, and she would treasure it forever. Whether or not they should have gotten engaged was not even part of the question. Similarly for Ginny, whether or not the young couple should have slept together was no longer consequential, what mattered was that they had and now she would raise the child that their love had created.

A small smile finally found it's way to her features as she thought that if the child were to have anything it was love. It may grow up without a father, but the babe would have more family, extended family, and family by association than any other child ever. Maybe, she mused, as sleep began to take her this child was a sign that though the past would leave its mark on everyone, life would continue and flourish, even for those most affected. As her dreams began to mix with her thoughts, she decided that she would have to go home soon, well before the baby was born. Somehow, this visit had made her feel more…..ready. Even if she was not quite ready to go yet, she now knew what she had to do.

Severus Snape could be the most patient man in the world when it suited him, but he found that being stuck in a small cabin far from home while his ward refused to even move did not suit him. On the fourth morning since Hermione's initial refusal to get up, Severus marched into her room, picked her up like a small child—despite her squirms of protest—and walked her down the hall dropping her, not too gently, into the bathtub.

She turned and gave him a mutinous glare as he stormed out of the bathroom practically shouting, "You _will_ be up and about this morning today, _Miss_ Granger!" before slamming the door leaving Dipsy to scramble in as his footsteps receded down the hall.

A few moments later, Hermione was in a tub full of pink bubbles, and the small elf was leaning over the side of the tub, scrubbing the matted mess of curls atop Hermione's head, standing tip-toe on a stool to reach. Hermione for her part was scowling indignantly with her arms crossed in front of her wondering where he had gotten the audacity to unceremoniously remover her half-conscious from bed and dump her in an empty bathtub, she would probably have a bruise on her hip as a souvenir.

"Missy should try not to be too cross with the Mister Snape, he were only trying to help. He look so worried these past days."

Hermione sighed at the house elf's small voice thinking that they might partly be true, she had been difficult for three days forcing Severus to feed her and barely even eating it. No matter, she had come to a resolution last night: she needed to be well enough so she could return home before the baby was born. Hopefully she would be able to make it for a bit of the pregnancy as well, she already regretted not being able to be there when her friend was going to tell Molly about the baby. Hermione sighed thinking of what she would need to do.

The stairs were proving to be more difficult than they had been previously after having spent three days in bed. She was holding on to the railing with all her might, but it did very little to stop her foot from slipping on the step as she prepared for the inevitable collide and slide with the staircase. Arms wrapped around her middle stopping the dreaded impact. She looked up into the face of her old Professor still bearing some of that morning's resentment.

"I'll take that look as a 'thank you,' for catching you," he said smirking, and added in a deeper voice, "And for dragging you out of bed this morning."

Though their interactions were strained at first, they soon found that fell easily back into routine. Severus had made them a delicious breakfast that Hermione had enjoyed greatly even though she tended to eat lightly at breakfast. Midmorning saw them walking outside, which tired Hermione out more than usual having been a few days for her. When she just didn't feel like walking anymore, they stopped and sat down by the water.

The warm lighting made the atmosphere cozy, and they sat in for a while silence before Severus had the gumption to ask what had been bothering him. "What was it that upset you so much after Miss Weasley's visit?"

Hermione, who had been picking at a blade of grass lost in thought, paused and looked up at him for a moment. It really wasn't her secret to tell, but something inside her made her think it would be easier to put her thoughts out there. Things always made more sense in the open. She smiled a bit and pointed to her stomach to which Severus raised and inquisitive brow. Sighing, she laid her palm flat on her belly and rubbed it, after which, she cradled her arms in front of her making a rocking motion.

"No!" Severus said with what he hoped didn't sound like too much interest, but Hermione nodded fervently pulling her legs up underneath her and sitting on them facing him so she could talk more animatedly. "Whose?"

She thought for a second before reaching a hand up to her hair and shaking it up.

"Potters?"

A nod. Then she picked up a red leaf and pointed to her hair.

"Ginny?" no. "Molly?" yes.

Hermione stuck up a finger wagging it back and forth shaking her head before pointing to her temple.

"Molly doesn't know?"

Hermione nodded. Somewhere inside, Severus was amused that they could communicate so easily this way, and was also amazed that he seemed to have the patience for it. But Hermione was flinging her arms about wildly as if to show Molly was going to "explode" when she found out. They continued on and Severus found out that Ginny was planning on keeping the baby despite whether or no Molly agreed with the situation. He had seen the red head's wrath on numerous occasions, and would not have been willing to suffer such attentions. Hermione however fully supported the decision.

"But why did that make you stay abed for three days?"

Hermione sobered up and faced away from him again letting her feet out from underneath her. She pointed to herself and to her head. "You were thinking?"

She told him that the baby was a good thing, and that it showed her life goes on and that she had to get better. Tentatively, he reached a hand out and placed it on her shoulders, as she brought her knees up and rested her head upon them. Having had a filling breakfast, they had planned on skipping lunch and having an early dinner. They sat side by side as the sun moved across the sky lost in thought.

Finally, Hermione turned to her companion and placed a small hand on his arm. She began signing to him. I want to get better, faster.

Severus agreed and told her that tomorrow they would begin working on more exercises that should held. After another moment, Hermione began making a box with her finger and wiggling one of them. She was asking for something, but Severus was at a loss for what.

"Sit ups?" no. "Dancing?" no. "Jumping?" no. "Swimming? Twitching? Worms?" He was swatted on the arm. After about ten minutes of the same sign and no correct guesses, Hermione sighed exasperatedly and got up to go in the house leaving Severus to wonder if she was mad at him, but when she realized that he had not followed her, she came back and took his hand.

He found that he was being led to a dictionary which he set on a table and opened for her. Hermione flipped the paged until finding the one she wanted and pointed to a word.

Picture.

The movements she made must have been to mimic a muggle camera. Well they had plenty of pictures, what could she possibly want one of? Before he got the chance to voice the question, she was flipping pages again finding the word to express her needs.

Friends.

Severus swallowed the lump in his throat as he asked, "Are you sure?"

Her head nodded determinedly making her curls bob back and forth distracting attention from the less than certain look in her eyes. He took one of her hands into his and told her he would write to Minerva asking the favor. One of the changes that had to be made since making the cottage undetectable was their postal service. Everything reached them now care of McGonagall via Floo.

That night, as he tried to drift off to sleep, he found himself overrun by different….. concerns. Hermione now seemed determined to get well again, whereas before she just seemed to be a mess of emotions. There was no doubt that this resolve would increase her progress greatly. However, Severus was also a bit disappointed thought he knew it was still selfish of him. He liked to feel needed and he wanted her to need him forever. A rogue thought crossed somewhere deep in his brain that asked if maybe he had come to need her to need him, but it was gone before it had the chance to be processed. He drifted off to sleep feeling odd and a trite sad.

He awoke somewhere in the wee hours of the morning and found himself subconsciously snuggling up to something that wasn't there. Annoyed, because he thought with a return to schedule they would return completely to their routine, he rolled over and harrumphed. For all the trying he did though, he found that he could not return to sleep. Deciding that as long as he was up, he might as well do what he was here for, he went to check on Hermione.

Her legs were sticking entirely out from under the covers which had entangled themselves around her waist. She was turning from one side to the other and squirming about on the bed. Suddenly, she kicked the covers off of herself entirely and shot straight up in bed, her eyes flying open. It wasn't until after she caught he breath that she realized Severus was leaning in her door way. He smirked at her.

"Couldn't sleep either?" After she sighed, Severus motioned to her. "Come on." But Hermione did not come, instead she looked away from him, clutching at something he could not see under he white night gown as she slowly shook her head.

She heard him indignantly leaving her room, and she laid back down, she couldn't go could she? It would be wrong. But perhaps it was alright if she went merely because it helped her sleep. Well, in any case, she must be getting better if she could contemplate such things and not get overly upset. Perhaps, perhaps she was getting better. And getting better meant getting over and accepting the past at the same time, right? Maybe she couldn't understand how it was done right now, but she could take the first step toward doing it couldn't she?

A shaking hand reached under her nightdress and pulled out the chord that held Ron's ring. And she did something odd that she could never admit to, but it made her feel better. She talked to Ron in her head.

I'm sorry, and you know I love you. If you were here we'd be married soon, but you aren't. I am here and I'm alone. You wouldn't want that would you? You would want someone to take care of me? Even if it was someone you didn't particularly enjoy. You would want me safe and healthy, I know it. You are always here inside me, but I can't continue living tied to a past that I can't return to. I love you, but I have to move past this. I know you understand.

She smiled to herself thinking that if Ron were looking down on here from somewhere, he would understand, even if she didn't. Perhaps, wherever he was, he now possessed the clairvoyance on those that was not present among the living, and he would know how much Hermione needed sleep—and a little bit of compassion. With a last long look at the necklace she was holding, she put it away in the drawer next to her bed before she got up and headed down the hall.

Severus did not question it when he heard light footsteps padding down the hall and over his bedroom floor. He did not look when he felt his bed decline under the weight of another body. And he did not stir when he felt the small and familiar hand come to rest on his upper arm as a warm body slid under the comforters next to his. But when he heard the content little sigh from the body next to him, he smiled ever so faintly, and he lifted his arm encircling her body and allowing her to snuggle up to his chest.

The rest of the night passed easily for them, and both were secretly of the opinion that morning had come too soon.

When the morning came, both of the bed's occupants woke and went about their morning routine getting ready for the day. Neither spoke about their sleeping arrangements; it was the same as every morning they woke up together.

After eating the breakfast Dipsy prepared, Severus waved a hand clearing the small table of dishes and brought out some paper and a large black crayon. Hermione looked at him inquisitively.

"Drawing," he remarked, "we need to work on your fine motor skills."

She was getting a bad feeling about this. In the past few weeks, she had been able to feed herself, but her hands were shaky and she often found it easier to get her mouth to her hand than her hand to her mouth. Severus fixed the crayon into her hand and asked her to draw a circle.

It was almost a circle, or rather it had the right concept but had gotten confused somewhere along its course. It began and ended at roughly the same point, but it was full of little loops and squiggly lines and was much larger to the left than it was to the right. The result frustrated the poor witch who was used to succeeding at everything she tried, not even being able to draw a circle made her feel beyond helpless, like a small child who was remedial in school.

Before Severus could even speak, she pressed down the crayon to try again, and again, and again. Each time the result was the same, and every failed attempt brought the tears to her eyes. When her paper was covered in almost-but-not-circles and wet splotched, Severus took the crayon from her. Her head fell to the table as she let frustration overcome her.

Imagining what this must have felt like for her, Severus found himself rendered speechless. Had they been in a class somewhere in Hogwarts and the circles been some potion or spell, Severus would have increases her tears with his words, cutting her down for her incapability. As it were, the simplicity of the task and her inability was too overwhelming to mock. Neither could he find words adequate enough to ease her sorrow should he be so inclined to do so. These tears he knew were different from the ones he had become accustom to. These tears were not from the experience of battle, or the loss of her friends. These tears were the realization of how compromised she had become.

Of the whole time they had been in this house, Hermione had never felt more helpless than she was in this one moment, and Severus had never felt more insufficient as a caretaker. Yet at the same time, he had never felt more compassion for another being.

He moved slowly at first, unsure of himself, but he pulled a chair up beside her and pulled back gently on her shoulders to expose the writing paper once more. Turning over paper, he placed the crayon in her hand, but then clasped her hand in his own. Together, they pressed the crayon to the paper and began to arc the crayon counter clockwise over the paper. It wasn't perfect, they rarely ever are, but there was no doubt that it was a circle. When Severus spoke, it was just above a whisper.

"You see, you can do it. You just need a little help. Don't give up on yourself Hermione. Don't give up on yourself, and I won't give up on you."

Hermione turned and looked up at Severus, her eyes still glassy and wet from the tears. They had only been drawing circles, but somehow it meant so much more and they both knew it. With a thumb he brushed away her tears and they sat looking at each other, a silent agreement passing between them.

After a moment, Hermione began to lean forward causing a discomfort to possess Severus that he had not been privy to before that moment. When her head came to rest on his chest he let out a breath he had not realized he had been holding and he patted the girl awkwardly on the back. His heart was thrusting itself rapidly against his rib cage while he prayed that Hermione couldn't hear it. Considering her position, she probably could but at least she didn't acknowledge it. As his body began to regain composure, cursed it silently for having betrayed him like that and wondered what this girl was possibly doing to him.

The bond that was growing between them was both strange and foreign. Severus, who was rather good at taking care of himself was learning to care for not just take care of someone else, something he never thought he would do in his adult life. He had found himself questioning his purpose, why he was left after the war, and as the days had passed the answer had changed from "I have no idea," to "helping the girl regain her health," to simply "this." The thought had crossed his mind before, and he was certain of it now: he needed Hermione in a strange way. She in turn found that not only did she need Severus, for she was quite helpless on her own, but that she was grateful to him as he had no obligation to her really.

That thought seemed to her the most troubling thought of all. The man she had known at Hogwarts would never have just agreed to take on a charge, let alone one who had been as insufferable as she had been in her youth. Once again she was confronted by the fact that she was not the only person who had been changed by this war.

Their moment ended as both pulled away from their thoughts wondering at the comfort they continually felt in their embrace. As an awkward moment threatened the atmosphere, Severus began to speak.

"Poppy, has sent over some other exercises that might suit you better than the last one if you care to step outside."

Hermione nodded eagerly, wanting to get away from her earlier failure.

The first of the tasks was crawling on the ground on all fours. Both thought this was odd, but it was under the orders of the Mediwitch. The exercise was silly and Severus found himself laughing at Hermione as she crawled over the ground getting her dress dirty. He cleaned the skirt with a wave as he informed her that now she was to skip.

After a series of completely strange activities, they went inside. She was anxious to get back to use magic again, but it could prove disastrous if the movement of her hands in drawing spoke for her aim.

Once dinner had come and went, they retreated to the living room where Severus produced a box. Minerva had sent three that morning: one of pictures of friends who were alive and well, one of friends who had been lost in the war, and one of Harry and Ron. He had only produced the first box and trepidation hung in the air as he uncovered the lid.

When he asked, she let him know she wanted to look through the pictures alone at first.

The first picture had been taken very recently of Ginny, who was lifting up her shirt to show her pregnant but flat belly, she was laughing prettily and rubbing her abdomen. The next few pictures were of the Weasleys doing various things, she particularly enjoyed one of Arthur playing with a muggle remote control car—he had been almost certain the remote actually worked by magic, but found the toy quite amusing. There was one of Remus and Tonks with a note attached to it hinting that the girl might have to find a new nickname soon as this one might no longer be applicable, though that was just a rumor. There were some of Minerva herself, Hermione most enjoyed one of her transforming into a cat and back. There were some of friends from Hogwarts, Neville, Dean, Lavender, and some others. She found a picture that at first was so still it seemed to be muggle. A boy was sitting on the ledge of large window looking at the night sky, his dark hair almost blending in with the dark castle and sky around him. A shooting star shot through the picture and he sighed. As his shoulders went up and down she wondered if he was making a wish and if so what it was for. When the star was gone and the sky dark once more, the boy turned, and Hermione realized that he was Severus at about age fourteen. He was a sad looking boy, lonely really, and she found herself wondering about his time in school.

"I was fourteen there," he said looking over her shoulder, "It was the Christmas holidays. Dumbledore took the picture, he was always nice to me when no one else was." He turned and walked away and Hermione continued to look at the sad boy in the picture.

The pictures confused Hermione greatly. There had been small sad smiles, tears, amusement, sorrow. She felt so much in the hour that she sat looking at pictures, that she could hardly handle it. Perhaps she had shut others out for this reason, for the chaos of emotions stirring within her, and maybe sorting it out was all it would take to move on. But how long could that take. The memories were too much, memories of a life she had never had, one that was ripped from her in her childhood. Yet, the memories were nothing compared to the lost hopes for the future. She thought of Ginny who had wanted to become an Aruor, Ron who was going to play for the Cannons, Harry who would just 'be' for a while. The pain of their loss was too great even without seeing their smiling faces. Something caught in her chest making it hard to breathe.

But she refused to give into the grief that threatened to consume her, if she kept going through pictures, it would stop. About an hour later, Hermione had fallen asleep amongst the pictures and Severus decided to carry her up stairs. The activity had been emotionally exhausting for Hermione and though he understood why she wanted to be alone, he felt a bit sad that she did not need his help. He lingered in the hallway for a moment wondering which direction he should go in. The girl in his arms squirmed waking up.

"It's alright. You fell asleep, so I was carrying you up to bed."

She gave him a sleepy smile and glanced at his door answering his question for him. As he laid her upon the bed, she managed to open her eyes half way, a smile on her face. No matter what she felt earlier she knew one thing: the wizard holding her brought comfort far greater than any she had known before. She had snuggled up to him before he could even properly lay down, clinging fiercely to the warmth of his body. It was much more real than memories or hopes. He was here, tangible.

Perhaps life up to this point had all been a dream. Maybe there had never been a Voldemort. Maybe tomorrow morning she would wake up in those arms and begin to tell the strange tale of the years she had dreamt in one night to the one who held her close. She knew it wasn't true and would never be, but in those arms was where she found her peace. Those arms held the balance in her life, so long as they were there she knew she could go on. She had come to depend on those arms.

As the inhabitants of the summer cottage passed into a comfortable sleep, its owner was furiously pacing back and forth in her own room. A letter had arrived that was meant to go to the cabin. No doubt, its author was livid that the house could no longer be found. The letter was short and to the point:

Enjoy the time you've bough, you won't have much more. You will never escape me.

It was untraceable and the handwriting had been magically altered so that it did not even provide a remnant of its writer. She tried using every spell she could to find the origins of the letter, but all in vain. There would be little sleep for her that evening. Even though they were hidden, she was terrified of what could befall Hermione or Severus so far away with no one to help them. Instead of sleeping she prayed to whoever was listening that neither of them would for some reason leave the house. A bad feeling settled in her stomach as she thought that the next time they set foot outside their safe house could be their last.

SSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

I meant to get this out sooner, but life had other plans. Sorry about that!

Thank you to everyone who reviewed, you give me brightness in this abysmal summer season. Thank you! I hope you enjoyed it!


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